Don't Save It for the Annual Review: How to Give Feedback Without the Fear or the Fluff

These numbers stop me in my tracks every time:

65% of employees say they want more feedback than they’re getting.

69% of employees say they would work harder if their efforts were better recognized.

At the same time, 58% say they’ve never received feedback that helped them grow.

Let that sink in.

That means nearly 7 out of 10 people on a team are craving direction, recognition, or course correction—and not getting it.

And here’s the kicker: it’s usually not because their leader doesn’t care.

It’s because the leader is busy, unsure of what to say, or afraid it won’t land well. Which is totally human. But also totally holding teams back.

The reality is:

✅ Praise without clarity feels empty.

✅ Critique without care feels threatening.

✅ Silence feels like indifference.

We don’t talk enough about how vulnerable feedback actually is, to give or receive. It requires you to slow down, get specific, and be brave enough to tell the truth—even when it’s uncomfortable. Especially when it’s uncomfortable.

Most Feedback Gets Lost in One of Three Ways:

  1. It never gets said at all (aka, the “I’ll wait and see if it improves” trap).

  2. It gets said too late, when frustration has already built up.

  3. It gets said poorly—either too vague (“You need to show more initiative”) or too harsh (“You’re just not cutting it lately”).

None of that helps anyone get better. What does? Brave, consistent, clear feedback given with care.

And yes, it’s a leadership habit. Not an annual event.

Giving feedback—real feedback—is uncomfortable. It asks you to be clear when it would be easier to stay vague. To care enough to disrupt someone’s comfort zone. To risk getting it wrong, in service of helping someone get it right.

That’s why it’s one of the bravest acts in leadership.

Not brave like a dramatic confrontation. Brave like small, intentional moments of truth-telling.

Think:

  • “Here’s something I noticed this week…”

  • “I want to offer this because I see your potential…”

  • “Can I give you a reflection I think could help?”

These aren’t confrontations. They’re invitations.

And when done consistently, they don’t just improve performance—they transform relationships.

Here’s What Brave Feedback Sounds Like:

Let’s reframe how we think about feedback. Brave leaders don’t hoard it for annual reviews or use it only when things go sideways. They use it to:

  • Affirm what's working. (Not in vague praise like “good job,” but specific, helpful observations: “The way you facilitated that meeting created real clarity. Keep that up.”)

  • Redirect when needed. (Without blame. With belief: “Here’s what I expected, and here’s what I saw. What got in the way?”)

  • Co-create better outcomes. (“Next time, what could we do differently to support better results?”)

Brave feedback is rooted in three quiet moves:

  1. Intention over impulse – You don’t wing it. You pause, reflect, and lead with purpose.

  2. Curiosity over certainty – You ask as much as you tell.

  3. Hope over judgment – You see feedback as a path forward, not a punishment.

You don’t need a formal sit-down to do this. You need presence, intention, and just a little courage.

Brave Leaders Give Regular Feedback Because:

  • They know silence breeds resentment or confusion.

  • They care more about growth than being liked in the moment.

  • They understand that clarity is kindness—even when it’s uncomfortable.

Feedback isn’t about having a big tough talk—it’s about keeping the little talks flowing so the big ones aren’t explosions.

That’s brave leadership in action.

Ready to Get Better at Giving Feedback?

Here’s your 3-part Feedback Habit you can start this week:

🔹 Catch someone doing something right (And tell them exactly what you appreciated—be specific.)

🔹 Course-correct in real time (Think: 2-minute hallway chat, not 30-minute performance review.)

🔹 Close the loop If you gave feedback last week, check in: “How did that go for you? Anything you need from me to keep improving?”

Final Thought

Giving feedback doesn’t get easier. You just get braver.

You don’t need a script. You just need to care enough to say it now—not six months from now.

Remember: your team doesn’t need you to be flawless. They need you to be honest. Kind. And brave.

That’s how trust is built. That’s how performance grows.

That’s how you become the leader people remember.

The kind of brave leader that cares enough to tell the truth. The kind of brave leader that builds trust over time. The kind of brave leader that earns loyalty, growth, and results.

This week, give one piece of feedback you’ve been holding onto. Start there. That’s your next Small Brave Move®.

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Brave Leadership Requires Psychological Safety